Every possible blade of grass in the country has been invaded by Aliens, Bad Evil Things called Weeds and every man, woman and child in the country is up in arms to combat this noxious presence, stamp it out, ZERO TOLLERANCE. And what, pray tell me, is the offending substance, Your honour it is nothing less than DANDELION, the dreaded weed of any lawn pride taker. I sentence it to death, immediately and without reading it its rights. To be taken from this courtroom and to be poisoned on the spot and every other member of its species too. Show no mercy. And for God’s sake, DON’T ADMIRE IT. It will try to win you over, flirt with you, show you its beauty, its charm. Just don’t heed it. Stamp it out immediately before it spreads its dirty little existence and multiplies because that’s what it does. It multiplies and before you know it not only every blade of grass but every flower bed and vegtable patch will be overrun by it.