This weekend we’ve certainly made good use of our massive freezer that we have in the shed. First of all, during the week I had tomatoes everywhere in the kitchen; in bags ripening with the aid of a ripe banana thrown in to the same bag and so I made a tomatoe sauce over the weekend. I put the sauce into a few different containers and stuck them in the freezer. Then, yesterday, I made courgette and mint soup, both of which we have growing in the garden. So those rather oversized courgettes that needed a new life have it now in the form of soup. That is also gone into the freezer in various sizes of container. Today we went out picking mushrooms and came back with easily 2 kilos. So what do you think I did with them? Yes, I made soup, leaving a few for himself for during the week for his breakfasts and snacks and whatnots. When that soup cools down it’ll also be put in varying sizes of containers and into the freezer. Good old freezer!!
Let me tell you about my charming brother in law. Not the one who is constantly cleaning the kitchen floor, nor the one who sometimes, or many times, partakes in a glass(een) of wine with his favourite sister in law, me. And I’m certainly not talking about the one who makes soap for a living nor the one who is wild about music although the one I am talkiing about also loves music. In fact all my brothers in law love music and when they get together they talk about little else. No Im talking about the brother in law who has a high opinion of himself and when he gets a gold filling thinks he should be broadcasting it all over and trying to make poor honest-to-god folk, like ourselves here, feel small and insignificant with our ordinary greyish fillings. You wouldn’t see me taking a photo of the inside of my mouth but this guy, well, he is so full of self pride that he thinks even the inside of his gob should be pictured. And then he has the cheek (no pun intended) to title the email, to which he attached this photo, “I’m rich and You’re poor”. And that’s my charming brother in law!!
What in God’s name and that of his holy mother does that mean? Or what is she suppose to be cutting? And who the hell is she? These are just three questions that come out of this rather peculiar question. So, am I being like the typical Irish man (woman) here? You know the joke:-
SOMEONE NON-IRISH: Is it true you Irish always answer a question with another question?
MAD IRISH WOMAN: Who told you that?
Well, in the meantime I did a little searching for the term “How’s she cuttin'” and found out that the cutting refers to a boat cutting through the water. And we all know what it means. It means “How are you”.
MAD IRISH WOMAN: HOW’S SHE CUTTIN’?
MAD IRISH MAN: LIKE A KNIFE
Is that good or bad? Does that mean that the mad irish man is in fine form or has he a splitting headache and he feels he’s being split in two from the head down?
I GIVE UP.
Well, it’s coming up to that time of year again when anyone, that is anyone gets into their wellies and off they go to the national ploughing championships. This year it will be held in Ratheniska, Co. Laois and so not a million miles away from us Offaly people. Most won’t even go near the actual ploughing championships, but will be heading there to see some tractors and bulls and prize winning sheep or chickens or goats even. There’ll be crowds around the burger vans, with their chips falling off the paper plates as they hold onto their skirts to keep them from flying up and revealing all. You won’t be able to get near any of the food stands with the angry mob queuing up for their free samples. Some of us thrive in this environment and those type of people will be spotted with the slight grin on their faces walking around with a “divil-me-care” attitude, lapping up the atmosphere with gusto. Others, are not so fortunate as to be at ease in company and you’ll see them with creased foreheads from too much frowning, traipsing after the person they are with or you might get a glimpse of them hiding behind a whiskey in the bar area or back in their cars waiting for the missus to finish spending all the money that they don’t have.
There will something for everyone. Do you think you might be in with a chance to win the “Best Dressed Lady” award or maybe you are so blinded by love for your child that you think she might be in with a chance to get “Bonny Baby 2013”. Perhaps, you have come with your dog to enter into the “doggy” competition.
And if you’re not into competitions or tractors or pigs you can always just hang out in the leader tent T.315. That’s where we’ll be, we meaning the “Experience Offaly” food craft and tourism “bunch”. We’ll be there, the whole friggin’ bunch of us, stamping our wellies on the floor in the hope of getting a bit of feeling back into our numbed feet, rubbing our hands together for the same purpose of keeping out the cold, attending the throngs of hopeful individuals who are sure they will be the winners of our wonderful competition. Now, I am not being sarcastic here. I really do mean every word when I say that this is the mother of all prizes. Details are below, just look for yourself!! And if you do come and register with us you will get one of our material bags with the promotional tag on it advertising ourselves. You might be happy to get that bag in order to put all those leaflets you’ve managed to pick up here and there unbeknownst to yourself as you scratch your head wondering where all this bloody advertising rubbish can be kept until you get home and throw it all in the bin anyway. But you’ll keep our bag because it might come in handy when you’re going to Dunnes someday and then you’ll look at the tag and say “Ah, there’s Heartworks. I just might give them a ring. I have a wedding present to buy” See you all there. Don’t forget your wellies and your lipstick
Come visit the Experience Offaly stand
within the LEADER village (Stand 315, Row T)
at this year’s National Ploughing Championships
and be in with a chance to win an
Experience Offaly overnight stay.
The prize includes an overnight stay including spa treatments for two
at the Clara House Holistic Spa, a guided walking tour of
Lough Boora Parklands and dinner at the award winning Sirocco’s Italian Restaurant.
The winner will also receive a hamper of Offaly Delicious and Offaly Crafty products.
The Experience Offaly stand will offer visitors to the ploughing an opportunity
to find out more about what Offaly has to offer from a craft, food and tourism perspective.
Craft makers including Bramber Studio, Heartworks, Karl Gill Woodworking
and Linda Kelly Design will be on site to tell you about their hand crafted pieces.
Food producers including Clanwood Farm, De Mad Food Company,
O’Gorman’s Cottage Condiments and The Wild Irish Foragers & Preservers will be happy
to offer you advice on how to make best use of their produce.
Members of the Offaly Tourism Network will be glad to tell you more about
what Offaly has to offer families, outdoor enthusiasts, culture vultures,
Now I mean “unusual” in the best possible way. Our friends, Terri and Smiley with their lovely daughter, Sheenagh are definitely a rare threesome and they love unusual things. That’s why we gave them this pendulum, to commemorate firstly their union which took part in the summer of 2012 and then the birth of their daughter a few months ago. I really hope that it is unusual enough for them!!!
Now you might have to be Irish to understand this title and even being Irish doesn’t guarantee that you will get the gist of this gibberish. “Ar ais aris” in irish means “back again” and this play on the words, or this attempt to anglicise the irish words is me trying to be witty or funny. I know I’m not doing a very good job but I will persist.
You see, I have a rash on my back and I’ve had it before so I’m trying to say that I have the rash back again. Get it? No? Ah well. Don’t worry, you’re not alone. And now I have to attend to my rash and make sure it doesn’t come back a reesh!!